One Year Later

I originally blogged these words a year ago today. I still believe them, and wanted to share them again for my new readers since last year. Today I turned 31. On a personal note, I didn't search for this until today, but it is interesting to me in light of what I've been planning to preach tomorrow. (Note: I did not finish my Masters degree this year :-( )

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Today is April 18 as you can tell by the time stamp of this post. Today is my 30th birthday. Someone asked me how I felt about it, and I shared with them the truth. I want to be older. It seems to be a contrarian view more and more that there is venerability with age. More and more we are a society that esteems youth, but I believe that age and experience are vital to fulfilling the mission of our life.

I view my life as preparation. In thirty years I have tried to prepare myself for the future that God has in store for me. In thirty years I have met the woman of my dreams, married her, and started a family. I've learned what a father's heart feels like in the elation of love that I feel for my girls and the pain of the fear that I may lose them. I've purchased a home, started investing in my future, bought and sold real estate. I've graduated high school, college, and plan to graduate from grad school for the first time this year. I've given my professional life to ministry to God and others. I'm proud of the church that I started and love each person that makes it what it is. I've established a track record of a good name and heart, all while walking with feet of clay. And while some of these seem like achievements I view them more as prerequisites. Things required in advance. In advance of what? Destiny.

I have a destination, but it's not here and now. It is there and then. I choose to live my life preparing so that when the moment comes, that deciding moment, when the destiny of my life reaches its climax I will be prepared.

My preparation has taught me that I'm weak and frail. That I'm not smart or clever enough. I'm not capable of loving pure enough, or of protecting strong enough. I can't trust in the provision of wealth or race to gain it. I am secure then in my destiny. I am not destined for greatness. I am destined for grace.

Whatever my life may prove to be, it is all preparation for the life that is to come. Prepare for tomorrow. Live like there's no tomorrow.

--Ben