Frustrated

Have I told you that I'm substituting for Anne Arundel County Schools? It is so frustrating. There are a couple reasons why I'm doing it, and I guess I have to share them before I launch my complaint.

Firstly, church planting has a long history of starving pastors. That is, it's not uncommon for church planters to require second jobs in order to make enough money to support their family. Substituting offers the unique advantage of being a job that you work when you want and only if you want. Making it very attractive to someone who wants to keep his eyes on his real job while supplementing his income. I should say here that so far, the church has been able to pay me exactly what we originally budgeted, thus the first pain of frustration (I don't need the money).

Secondly, my wife works specifically for project purposes. That means that we don't live on the money she makes. When she gets direct deposit the money is immediately split. Part stays in the checking account to cover her tithe to the Lord and the difference is saved (right now toward a car). But for all of our expenses we rely on my income. There are a number of projects that we're looking at so she feels the pressure to work towards them. I wanted to substitute in order to show Corie that I'm interested in these projects/extras. If she works for them I could too occasionally.

But, I'm so frustrated by it. I hate subbing. That's the long and short, and for someone who believes you should do what you love, I'm really annoyed doing the work. As mentioned before I don't need the money (not that I won't use the money, but my needs are covered without it), I took the job to fit my schedule, but I've worked nine days (all half-days) in the last two months. Why? Because if I don't get ten days in, I lose my certification and if I ever want/need to work next year I'll have to pay $60 and go through all the training again. Uggh. Only four days of school left. I need one more day. For those counting, if I hadn't been sick last week I would have had ten, but had to call out ill. Frustrating.

The most frustrating part is that I feel like it really distracts from the church. I have been giving too much time to trying to get these dates in. I'm tired of it. It is distracting me from doing what I love, and that is planting this church. Friday is the end of the school year, so probably I won't face the frustration anymore, but I needed to vent. I try to keep it light on the blog, but thanks for the rant.

--Ben