A Quote From C.S. Lewis

I follow CS Lewis on Twitter and each day I get an quote from his extensive writing. Lewis was a philosopher, professor, and author. He was asked to do a series of radio programs during blitz of WWII to build the faith of the Brits. That collection became a book entitled Mere Christianity, and that has been an inspirational book to me. He is also known for The Chronicles of Narnia, an allegorical children's story in multiple volumes.

Anyway, his quote today struck me as particularly poignant. Enjoy...

"There ought to be things we should like to do and cannot because our charitable expenditure excludes them."

--Ben

What Happens To The Church's Stuff

With the church closing I have heard a question pop up time and again: What is happening to the Church's stuff. Well, there are two categories I guess -- goods and cash. Our goods, all the equipment that fits in the trailer for example will be donated to other church ministries in the area. We're glad to give a gift, our drum kit, to Pasadena Assembly of God. We'll be giving a video projector to a church in Baltimore that would like to update their A/V, but don't have the money. And we'll be giving the rest to a church plant in Havre de Grace, MD. We know what a blessing it was when we were the recipients of equipment, now we're glad to be able to bless others.

The cash is the property of the Potomac District, and will be turned over to them at the conclusion of church business.

--Ben

Unwitting Accomplices

I've been reading the gospels lately, and have been reading about the events that led up to Jesus' death. It is surprising to me that the Pharisees and the governing body of the Temple, the Sanhedrin, allowed themselves to be overtaken with rage and crucify Jesus and fulfill so many prophecies. You might have thought cooler heads would prevail.

In Acts we have the Pharisee Gamaliel telling his cohorts that in the matter of Peter and John they should back off. If these men were truly working on behalf of God there was nothing they could do, and if they weren't then they'd fizzle like every other upstart movement popular in that time of Jewish history. This was within 100 days of Jesus' crucifixion. Where was Gamaliel's voice on the night in question.

Shouldn't someone have spoken up and said, "Let's wait until after Passover week. We don't want to make Jesus look like a sacrificial lamb." Someone to say, "Let's not trade him for Barrabas and risk making Jesus the scapegoat (a prophetic Jewish symbol)." Who approved thirty pieces of silver as a price for Jesus' betrayal to fulfill the prophecy of Jeremiah? Who decided to let him be whipped bearing stripes (Isaiah), before being accursed for hanging on a tree (Deuteronomy). I'd have thought somebody would have seen these things stacking up and said, let's wait a little longer.

Ah, but the sovereignty of God allowed them to be blinded by their own rage, hatred, and love of self and power to make them unwitting accomplices in His redemption plan.

--Ben

From The Mind Of Ben Rainey

When I watch a television show, especially dramas, I pay attention to who the guest stars are. Nine times out of ten the one guest star I recognize turns out to be the bad guy. The reason is that the bad guy is going to have to act in the climatic scene, so the casting department makes sure they have quality actors in those roles. It's a very important trick to figuring out what will happen in the end from the beginning, which is important to me.

Every story has to have a conflict/crisis and a climax where the conflict or crisis is resolved. The writers in most cases offer multiple suspects. Back in the day whoever Scooby Doo met first was, zoinks, the bad guy. Nowadays writers try to make it less obvious by having multiple people, but like the Scooby Doo days, most of them have the telltale sign of making the most recognizable actor the bad guy.

And that's how I see it.

--Ben

Philippians 4:6-8 Letter

Last week I sent a letter to SRCers that are dealing with the pain of losing a church that they love. I wanted to record it here for posterity:

One passage of scripture has been replaying in my mind and it is from Philippians 4:6-8, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.”

This passage is important for the following reasons:

Anxiety — There can be quite a bit of anxiety right now. Anxiety about where we’ll go from here. What will the next church be like? Will friends for SRC end up there together? Will we all end up in different places? What do other people think about us? We believe that we have honored God, do other people view us as failures? So much anxiety. But godly wisdom says that we can exchange anxiety for peace through prayer.

Thanksgiving — Our prayer and petition should be served to God with a side of thanksgiving. In just about a week we will pause with family and friends to enjoy the Thanksgiving holiday. I want to encourage you take time each day to give thanks to God. Find all the things you can for which to give thanks. I think it is a great spiritual discipline of choosing what we will remain focused on.

Peace — God’s peace is peace whether we can understand why or not. Sometimes even with the circumstances of life stacked against us, in the face of unmet expectations, and when things haven’t gone as we planned, somehow God gives us peace that He’s with us. And when our confidence is entrusted to him through prayer, Jesus himself guards our hearts and minds. As he stands guard he keeps our hearts and minds from running back to anxiety.

Choice — We can choose what we keep our mind focused on. Choose to think on good, pure, noble, and praiseworthy things. In my sermon two weeks ago, on the rules of the road ahead, I called for us to yield the right of way to others. The reason is that others are going to do and say things that are hurtful. In most cases there is no intention on their part to hurt us, but due to misinformation and misunderstanding and our process of grieving they hurt us nonetheless. I want to ask you again to yield the right of way to others. Most people have never experienced the kind of grief that we are facing. They just don’t understand. Be patient with them. Think of the good, pure, noble, and praiseworthy things that God is doing in those that offend us unintentionally. We can choose what we keep our mind focused on.

Over the next four weeks we have the opportunity to work through our grief with those that understand most — one another. I want to ask you to make a commitment to finish well, and be part of the final days of our fellowship. In an effort to allow everyone to be part of the services and receive the ministry of the word we will be keeping the children in with us during services. They have been very well behaved over the last two weeks, and I’m sure will be for the remaining services. The services will be as follows:

· November 21st — God’s promise to His Family

[A special element of this service will be the dedication of Carson and Calvin to the Lord. This will be a special celebration that we’ll share together.]

· November 28th — God’s promise for His Church

· December 5th — God’s promise for the World

· December 12th — All Church Celebration

Our final gathering (December 12) will take place at Joe and Jess Harp’s house for a brunch together. The focus of the morning will be a remembrance of all the wonderful experiences we’ve enjoyed as part of Severn River Church. This will NOT be a weepfest, it will be a chance to laugh, and share the joy of obedience and unity in the mission of Christ.

Baby Dedication

Yesterday I dedicated my son Carson, and my nephew Calvin to the Lord in a special ceremony at Severn River Church. Over the last few years I've always enjoyed the special ceremonies that Pastoral ministry has afforded me. Weddings, funerals, baptisms and baby dedications are wonderful and spiritual moments.

I've done baby dedications for my own daughter, my niece, and children of good friends from the church, but yesterday was the first time I've ever done more than one at a time. Having both boys was a real treat. They were both very cute all dressed up. I wish I had pictures to show you, but I was in a lot more pictures than I took yesterday.

These two precious boys are embarking on a life that holds infinite possibilities. Baby dedication is about the parents, extended family, and church family recognizing their responsibilities for the godly upbringing of these children. We dedicated them to the Lord for His good pleasure to do with them and call them to whatever he wishes. We view our time with them, rearing them in our home, as a gift and loan from the Lord.

I was a proud father and uncle yesterday. Thanks to everyone that was a part.

--Ben

An SRCers Perspective

One SRCer's view on the church closing and what these things mean.

Click Here To Read

Church Announcement

On Sunday, November 14, Severn River Church hosted our Presbyter, Don Cox, for a congregational meeting. After discussion of the current and future circumstances he announced that he will be making a recommendation to the Potomac District Board of Presbyters for the closing of Severn River Church.

Over the last few weeks I have worked with the Board of Directors to gather information from the congregation to get the best picture of SRC's possible future. After the data was collected a future emerged that would create a tremendous challenge to move forward. The District spoke with Ariel, our Associate Pastor, about the possibility of leading the church, and it was determined that it wasn't the leading of the Lord. In the end, in the face of tremendous challenges, the decision was made to recommend closure.

Don made it very clear that the District prefers to help churches move forward, but in this circumstance couldn't recommend that. He tried to be kind, knowing that the announcement would be very difficult because of the level of commitment and love of SRC that members have. He said that the District is not giving up on our town, but will regroup and look at future opportunities.

Severn River Church will conclude services with its final celebration on December 12, 2010. Please pray for us during this time of transition.

--Ben

Youtube -- DIYs best Friend

If you are a Do It Yourselfer (DIY) like me there are a number of projects that you'd like to do, but just seem a little unsure of how to do. I know I've referenced this before, but you can learn to do just about anything on youtube.

We've been having a problem with our door on our minivan. I found a website that gives step by step instructions how to fix it, but with no pictures. I thought, "I wish I could see someone do this." So I typed it into youtube and bam found it. You're probably not interested in the video below, but I just wanted to show you a typical how to video.

Thank You Veterans

Today is Veterans Day, and I want to take a moment to say thank you to those who have served and those currently serving to defend our country and the cause of liberty. I suppose the older one gets the more valuable life appears. The young can't appreciate the experiences of life the same way as the aged because they haven't experienced the depth of friendship, marriage, parenthood, and all those things that make life rich, at least I know I didn't. The more wealthy one becomes in life experiences the more we recognize that it is possible only through the sacrifice of others; especially the young who have put their lives on the line. Those young men and women who make the ultimate sacrifice do so having never enjoyed the gift that they provide for others. Thank you to all who are serving and have served.

--Ben

Two Sides To Calling

In scripture the term "called" in relation to a vocation ministry is only used twice, yet the term "called" in relationship to every believer is used more often. I have felt a calling to ministry in my life. Yesterday I included the question "Is Pastor Ben leaving the ministry?" as an exaggeration to demonstrate how rumors get out of control. Well, it turns out...

I am not leaving the ministry, but I am leaving Severn River Church.

Apparently the rumor has already gone around though that I'm leaving the ministry. When you are dedicating yourself to serving the Lord you serve at His will. There are two sides to understanding His will. One is a releasing from, the other is a calling to. So far over the last 15 years I have always had a calling to: calling to VFCC, calling to PAG, calling to SRC. In this case I find myself released from Severn River Church without a real sense of where I'm called to.

This is probably where the confusion comes in for others. We are much more comfortable with knowing the answers than we are with only questions. But this is the faith part of following God's lead.

Release From: Faith
Calling To: Faithfulness

A friend of mine said that he couldn't imagine what I might do next because there are so many options: Further education, higher education, staff pastor, lead pastor, large church, turn around church, etc.

Well, I'm trying to figure that one out right now and looking for the door that God will open. I'm not sure it will open right away. But when it does I want the courage and obedience to walk through it.

--Ben

Degrees Of Separation

Is Severn River Church closing? Did Pastor Ben leave the church last week? Is Ben leaving the ministry? These and all other questions can be answered here or in personal conversation with me. However, it happens anytime there is news like this, speculation is passed on as fact, and it's a matter of degrees of separation. For as long as we ask questions of people that are separated from the event we will get their answer with their spin.

The week leading up to the announcement last Sunday I went to each household in the church and spoke with people to make sure they got the chance to hear the news from me. I had talked some of them into coming through a similar conversation. I felt they deserved to hear about my leaving the same way. When we got to the service on Sunday morning there were no surprises.

In one conversation though I found out that they had heard from a relative (that doesn't attend our church) that our church had disbanded the week prior; a week this couple had been away from church. Wow, it's amazing how information gets twisted.

Severn River Church is in a vulnerable spot, a transition no doubt, but the church did not close last week, nor will it next week. Some have misunderstood discussions about vulnerability as a declaration of closure. Severn River Church held an informational meeting Sunday to discuss the challenges that are ahead and poll the congregation about their commitment to facing those challenges. Tonight the church board is meeting to interpret the results of that poll, and on Sunday we'll host a District Official to discuss the options the church faces.

My resignation and the church's future are two separate issues. The Assemblies of God has classifications of churches. Our church is a Home Missions church which means it is ultimately run by the Board of Presbyters. We are submitting to a process they have approved.

So, a couple things I'd ask moving forward. I'd ask you to not be part of spreading misinformation, because it doesn't benefit anyone. I'd ask you to be considerate of SRCers that love their church, and are facing a turbulent time of transition right now. I'd ask you to not assume anything.

I've spoken with SRCers this week that have been hurt because of the assumptions of people that aren't part of the church and the pressure from the "cloud of witnesses". What we are doing at SRC is what is patterned in the book of Acts 15:28, "it seemed good to the Holy Spirit and to us..." We are seeking what seems good to the Holy Spirit and us for the future of this ministry.

I'll keep you informed of the facts as they unfold.

--Ben

Only As Far As Facebook

One of the issues that I have faced is the relationship that I have with the people of SRC. A common thought I've heard expressed is sorrow over the loss of friendship that occurs when distance separates friends and family. The, "What will I do without you?" thoughts that are expressed by some are a grief for that relationship loss.

We live in a world that is different from what it was only a decade ago. We now have Facebook, Linkedin, and all sorts of social networking on the interwebs. Of course you'll still be able to keep up with me through www.benjaminrainey.com so long as I pay the bill each year or two to renew the domain name.

More importantly though I will be able to remain in contact with you. Relationships change no doubt, but we have more resources now than ever before to be able to connect when we need to.

--Ben

Baby Dedications

Hey on November 21st we'll be dedicating Carson Rainey and Calvin Gilt to the Lord at SRC. I'm looking forward to this special service. Carson and Calvin are cousins. Carson is, of course, my son and Calvin is my nephew.

If you have the chance, we'd love to have you join us for this special day. The dedication will be held during our regular morning service.

--Ben

Friends And Counselors

Throughout the last month and a half or so, as I came to the decision of resigning, I turned to a number of trusted friends and counselors to share what I was thinking and sensing in my heart was to be my next step. I have been blessed with relationships with men of God that I can trust for good direction.

What a blessing that the first person I would turn to would be my own father. I could probably write a post on his role in this decision (and probably will), but for now let me say that I'm so thankful to have a loving father that gives me godly advice and gracious love.

Several other pastors and leaders were kind enough to talk with me and help me gain a better perspective of my future. In times of transition it is always good to turn to godly influences and get their thoughts and advice. Here's the thing: sometimes they contradict one another, because they're human. But in the conversations you allow God to speak to you through his people. That is the benefit. He uses the collection of voices to speak to you. God speaks to us through His word, His people, and His Holy Spirit.

If you're facing transition right now don't do it in silence. Find trusted, godly friends and counselors to help you.

--Ben

The Blindside

How do you announce a major life decision? Who should know, and when, and in what order, and to what degree?

These are questions that I've wrestled with over the last few weeks. I talked to my father first. (He is a vault. If you tell him something in confidence you can be sure it will stay confidential.) I talked to my sister second because she has been a partner with me working as my employee at the church for the last year plus. Then presbyter, certain close friends, mentors/pastors, my family, my inlaws, the church board individually then collectively, the church members individually then collectively. Always carefully widening the boundaries of who knows what. Carefully because I didn't want those that are affected the most by the decision finding out from those that are affected to a lesser degree. So a lot of agreements were made that the information would stay secret until the appropriate time. I have to tell you as someone that values transparency that I hated carrying the secret. And it disappointed me, though it didn't surprise me, when confidences were broken through misunderstandings, and misinformation got out to people ahead of my ability to meet with them personally. But that's the rumor mill, it's just the way things are. Overall, everyone was very helpful in keeping things appropriately quiet.

It turns out though that when the decision becomes public there are a lot more people that are shocked, surprised, even interested than you can think of. And there just is no soft way of saying I'm leaving the church I've founded, that you've given money and prayer support to, that some have just connected with, and that others were meaning to connect with. The expectations that come from that cloud of witnesses is something I've never had to deal with before. I maybe haven't handled it the best. I'm learning through this transition. I think generationally/technologically there is probably some difference to the dissemination of information. Those of a previous generation seem to be more private. To them openly discussing my thoughts and feelings on a website is probably unfamiliar at best, totally inappropriate at worst. It certainly speeds up the process. In years gone by a pastor could leave a church and it take months, maybe years for that news to move through channels of interpersonal discussion. Now I type it, Twitter repeats it, Facebook announces it and I have people states away sending me messages expressing their reaction. (Appreciated btw) I guess in some way I feel this gives direction to the rumor mill because at least there is a place where people can hear from the horses mouth.

I know that my announcement has blindsided many. It was not my intention to hurt or confuse anyone. As I've said and written I'm available to answer questions you may have. Change is unsettling, often it is easier to deal with if we have the blanks filled in, as it were. I'd be happy to do that.

--Ben

Why So Quiet?

Some have asked why my blogging has dropped off so much over the last month. Well, if you haven't read my previous post you might want to. Yesterday I announced my resignation from Severn River Church. I published my resignation address to fill in blanks that some of you may have. News like this doesn't take long to travel, and doesn't take long to get distorted, so I've put it up to help people understand and put it in perspective. This week I'll probably start adding posts related to the questions that I've received from those I've talked to about it. Chances are the questions that you have will be answered this week, but if not don't hesitate to ask. A pastor's resignation is different from any other it seems. I'm happy to try to help you, it will be helpful for me too.

--Ben

My Resignation Address From This Morning At SRC

There are two ways to live this life. One is to live for your self, the other is to die to self. One leads us to pride, selfishness, and the hollowness of a life stolen, killed, and destroyed; the other to an abundant life in Jesus Christ. I have always tried to live my life as one who dies to self and follows Jesus. I take him at his word that whoever tries to keep his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake shall find it. It is with this core belief that I am compelled to resign from Severn River Church at the end of this year.

Six years ago I began to hear God leading me to leave a church I loved to start a new church, and four years ago we launched it. For four years we have worked, and sweated, and laughed, and cried together for the mission of Christ: making disciples, baptizing them, and teaching them to obey God’s word. And for four years we have seen the hand of God move in and through us. Over the last few weeks I have met with many of you to talk with you about my decision. I have been received warmly as family. I appreciate that. That’s not to say that everyone has been happy or uplifted by this decision. I understand that it has hurt the sensitive parts of your hearts, and it has mine as well. Some began to share memories of times my ministry helped them in particularly difficult times in their life; the low points. It took me by surprise I guess, because I don’t think about those low points. I see the highpoints of growth, overcoming, and maturity. I love Severn River Church. I love its people, its families, I love its mission and mission field. I have learned so much here with you, from you.

My next steps are a little unclear. I don’t have an offer from another church, and have only started preparing to take the next step since coming to this decision. My future is in the Lord’s hands, and I trust that he will provide what I need. I wrestled with this decision a lot, and didn’t come to it quickly. I want you to know that I love you, I am proud of you, and I am thankful for you and all that you’ve done as you’ve partnered with me in this plant.

I recently met with a mentor of mine to discuss this decision and my future. He asked me if I could write the script of my life where I would see it going from here. I told him that I didn’t know. The script of my life had been written I thought. I would be at SRC, I thought, for twenty or thirty years. The Lord has other plans.

I will conclude my ministry at Severn River Church at the end of this year. Over the weeks to come I’ll be doing my best to lead the congregation through this time of transition. There are sure to be challenges but also joys along the way. I pray that throughout this transition we will continue to grow in the theme that we embraced for this year, “Formed in His image”. We began this year by meeting at Pastor Ariel’s condo for brunch. While we were there we passed out play dough and practiced forming the clay in our hands. It seems that God had a plan for that as he was shaping me, preparing me for this next step. And in the same way he has been shaping and preparing you. Here’s what I know: We will walk together for the next two months as pastor and parishioner. We will walk forever as brothers and sisters in Christ. In closing I want to share a scripture that sums up how I feel from 1 Thessalonians 2:8, “We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us.”

The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.

Some Things I Need To Say About My Wife

I don't think everyone gets who they deserve in marriage. There are a lot of people that think that way. I am not one of them, because I am living proof that sometimes people get more, much more than they deserve. Conversely, Corie is proof that sometimes people get far less than they deserve.

When I met Corie she was the quietest girl in school. She was pretty and interesting to me, and in the insecurity of my youth my flirting was beneath her quality. Yet when I asked her out she said yes, and we enjoyed baseball games and fireworks together. Much more could be said of our courtship, but there was seven years of that so suffice to say we loved each other from a young age and knew that we enjoyed something special.

You'd think that after dating for seven years you'd know the person you were marrying pretty well. But there has been much that we've had to learn over the last nine years of marriage. She's learned that I'm forgetful, and have a strong tendency to want to serve the church. At times in my life that dedication to work has been a great frustration to her, and it is something that I continually try to keep in moderated check. I often put the needs of others and the church ahead of her needs. This is the real me that she has had to learn about while we've been married. My rewards are eternal, and not much anywhere else. Still she loves me and makes due with what we have providing a good home for our children, and a safe place for me to come and rest. In some churches there are traditional stereotypes of what the pastor's wife ought to do and be. Corie doesn't play the piano or sing that well, and I remember a time when she was concerned about how she would be received by churches that we served. I told her that I didn't need her to do any of that. I needed her to believe in me and nurture our children. She gets an A+ in fulfilling my expectations.

Corie has many traits that I have learned about over the years, as well. She is direct, sees the world in black and white, and sees only here and now. She helps keep me grounded. I prefer to always look to there and then. She keeps our home running smoothly. She is frugal to the point that when I'm able to give her money to spend on herself (not often) she always comes home with stuff for our kids or part of the money saved for future use for the family. Whenever she has a big spending day she feels the need to explain how each piece of clothing was a deal. I gave up caring a long time ago, if she bought, then it was worth buying; I know that.

Corie is always tired. She could look for a bed anytime of day or night. She's always been that way. But she is also tireless in the way she pursues things that are important to her, or the way she meets her obligations. Her perseverance and propensity to delayed gratification would do many a great good if they would simply learn to live like her. If Corie takes on an obligation, you can rest assured it will get done.

These are things that I need to say about my wife. Because she's so quiet many people don't know her like those closest to her. I was blessed the day she said "I will". I don't believe everyone gets who they deserve in marriage.

--Ben